Psalm 27:7

Hear, O Lord, when I cry aloud;

Be gracious to me and answer me.

Abba,

It astonishes me that you dain to look upon me.

To notice such a creature as broken as I.

As I pondered this simple two line verse, I could not escape the grace of your response to our cries.  I could not escape the grace of your answer.  I could not escape the grace inherent in your attention that is turned upon us.  I pictured it as a lonely, isolated, rejected individual cowering in the corner, ignored by all but who desperately longed for the attention of the king to be favored upon him.  I pictured an extreme contrast between who you are and who I am.  For in this imagery in my mind, the startling beauty of grace cast forth its brilliant rays and I stand in awe of it. 

These are my thoughts, Abba.  And they bring me to worship You, a God who hears when I cry and who, in your grace, hear and answer those cries.

Amen

Grace of Hearing

The deepest hurt,

The greatest offense,

The sharpest wound,

Is not of being openly rejected;

It is not of being scorned and maligned;

It is not being defamed or slandered;

Is not even being mercilessly attacked.

But rather, the deepest hurt is found in something less obtrusive. 

The deepest hurt is in not even meriting attention at all.

It is being completely ignored,

Being treated with indifference

Unworthy of acknowledgment

Being treated so low as unworthy of notice.

To not even be thought of

A detail completely overlooked due to its “insignificance”.

At least in being challenged…

At least in experiencing opposition

In open ridicule

In brazen scorn

In harshest mocking

In these…

There is at least an acknowledgment of existence

But to be ignored

Treated as if one doesn’t exist

To be invisible

A phantom

To be overlooked without a second glance

Yes, this is the deepest cut.

And perhaps this is David’s deepest fear.

I mean, who is God?! 

He is ALMIGHTY, ALL WISE, ALL KNOWING, INFINITE creator of all things!

And what am I?

CreatED, limited, finite, weak, worthless.

He is majestic, beautiful, glorious!

I am marred, broken, scarred, and uncomely.

He is powerful and flawless!

I am impotent, failing, and broken.

His is the glance, the look, the attention we crave

Just once glance would ease the suffering of my soul

Just one word would soothe the longing.

Just one moment of time spared for me…

But why would he favor me with his attention?

I am not worthy of His beauty

Why would He even glance my way.

I am the object in the room that no one notices

Not given a second look

For it is not worth one

The vast difference between He and me

The disparage of my presence next to his

It is too great…too much

I don’t merit attention

At least, that’s how I see it.

But it is not how he’s see it.

I stand in the corner of the room.

All but ignored by everyone and everything.

Life moving past

None even notice my presence

And why would they?

Shame, loneliness, embarrassment crush my heart

Pain crushing my isolated soul.

Until he enters

Jesus, THE SON OF GOD, enters.

The King of Kings

Lord of Lords

In all his royalty, majesty, and beauty!

Exuding power and light…

All eyes turn to him with joy and pleasure!

I ache for Him

But….no, I dare not hope.

And yet, there it is…

His gaze…

Upon me…

His eyes…oh his eyes…

They pierce flesh bone

All else is ignored.

As if he stood in a vacant room.

He only has eyes for me.

None other matter.

He sees.

He has heard.

He knows.

He comes near.

That is grace.