It does not take long for life’s cares to scream louder than the still small voice of the living God.  For he does not scream, shout, or raise a raucous.  He has displayed Himself openly for all to see and extended open arms for us to come.  As children of God, when we find ourselves outside the embrace of his tender but strong arms; when intimacy and closeness with God is absent; it is because we have left his strong arms; we moved away from Him.  And in so doing, we find ourselves swirling amid the confused chaos of the voices of life’s cares.

I am sure that each of us have at times been in the position where God feels distant because of the clamoring of the world’s cares that has deafened us to his voice and presence; because we were lured into self trust and self rule instead of surrender and submission to Him who rules the universe. 

Personally, throughout my life, I have at times found myself in that place where God seems distant; where the cries and chaos of the world seems to be all that I can see and hear.  Though it has happened with less frequency in these later years, I am not immune to this danger.  And in the past week, I did once again recently found myself there.  Busyness, troubles, and stress of life led me away.

After several mornings of not being able to focus on God alone for the distractions that bombarded me, I prayerfully opened my heart seeking an answer to why it was that I could not focus, could not connect as I once had. It was in this prayer the Spirit spoke and I finally had ears to hear. I was not being still. I was not surrendering the chaos to simply be embraced and near to my Abba, Father. The realization struck me hard and my heart poured forth these prayerful words.

Abba,

It is the stillness I miss.

The silence.

The peacefulness.

Is it any wonder

That the quiet breeze

Washing through the leaves

Of trees so tall and mighty

And the utter silence

Of all else

As I stand alone in an open field

Is so alluring

And satisfying?

Standing alone

Nothing to distract

Nothing to scream and clamor

Nothing to break the stillness

It is a beautiful, rare thing.

Yes, It’s the stillness I miss.

The silence.

The peacefulness.

Life is noisy.

Distracting.

Even in the inactivity of the morning,

The busyness and chaos within

Overwhelms and distracts.

Time with you interrupted

By every stray thought

Every wild emotion

Every remembrance of the endless to do list

It is the stillness I miss.

The silence.

The peacefulness.

For in the stillness

There is a greater sense of intimacy

A greater force of your presence

A sweeter communion

A heightened awareness

You come in the stillness

And are felt more deeply.

“Be Still and know that I am God” (Ps 46:10)

In the “sound of a low whisper” you come (1 Kings 19:12)

In the surrendering of all

The setting aside of worry

The relinquishing of control

In the strength and might of trust

In the stillness of faith

Your presence is felt ever so satisfyingly.

It is the stillness I miss.

Oh Abba,

How has the chaos and busyness

Been permitted entrance?

How has the noise and clamor

Been issued a ticket of admission?

It has blocked you.

Hidden you from my view

By my simple choice

In response to my decision

Has it been permitted to overtake.

What a fool I am!

Forgive me for such foolish, careless neglect!

Forgive me for being lured away

From the security of your strong, tender arms

To instead be grabbed, scratched, and mauled

By the tearing grasping of the world’s frantic hands.

So now,

The critical question….

How are they uninvited?

Removed?

Kicked?

Banned?

How do I return?

How do I cast aside the arms holding me tightly

And find refuge once more in Yours

O Great God?

Circumstances be what they are

Busyness abounds

Unchanging

This is life

Yet, it need not be

That my heart and soul

Be burdened by the same

A call to release

To surrender

To lay down

To trust

To still my heart

And listen for the gentle whisper

This is the invitation you extend

Come

Feast

Dine

Enjoy the sustenance offered

Abba, I miss you.

Jesus, I miss the gaze of divine love and grace

Spirit, I miss the quiet, peace filled presence

I know it is still there

For you have not moved

You have not proven faithless

For this would be contrary to your nature

It is there.

Just buried.

Hidden.

Obscured in noise.

Oh how easy it is to slide

To be busy but fruitless

To be engaged and yet alone

Oh how easy to be consumed

Overtaken

Turned around

By the noise and clamor.

So silence the noise, Abba.

Bring a stillness to the circumstances of life.

Bring a cessation to the turmoil within

Quiet the voices raging in my mind

And bring a quiet contentment back to my soul

I surrender!

A simple joy of stillness in your presence

An euphoria of intimacy in just being

A quiet with which to hear your voice

To sense your touch

To feel your gaze

In the stillness

I rest secure in your presence.

Yes Abba, Yes.

It is the stillness I long for.

Ever are you present.

This I know

But in the stillness are You ever more known.

And so my heart craves

My soul years

To be alone with you

In the stillness

I am here

I come…