6/16/25   6:22 pm

Dad,

What do I say? Most people pass this day (8/16) w/out pause – w/out consideration. I can’t. I knew this day was coming. A little later tonight, actually. The night when it all changed. The night I never anticipated – I never thought would happen. At least not like it did. I knew death would come – eventually. None can escape that unless we happen to be blessed to be alive when the rapture happens. But when it came, truly, it took me a while, too long, to actually believe it. I guess that happened when I saw you (Around 10pm). It was unavoidable then. But even then I didn’t want to believe it. I couldn’t. 

What now? What happens now?

The heartache and grief that followed… 

In the years since – a cloud that has never fully left. Not sure it can. We just learn to Look Up and Press On with Abba’s grace carrying us.

Oh how I miss you. How I miss mom. And for her it feels like so much longer. And it is, truly, for the dementia stole her long before.

3 years. It doesn’t seem possible. But oh, how long the years have felt. How many times I wished I could talk to you. How many times just wanting to “be” with you. To hear you laugh. To make you laugh with the comedy videos I found. To have you love on my children – to show them the steady consistency of being there. To know and enjoy the simple joy of your presence. To be challenged by your value on eternal and relational things, more than physical or temporal.

3 years. Man, how I have – how I do miss you! There’s not a day that has gone by that I haven’t missed you, haven’t regretted not spending more time with you. Thank you for leaving a legacy that continues. Thank you for modeling, not perfection but faithfulness. Thank you for showing me Christ. Your impact in me continues. It resonates still and I will never cease to be eternally appreciative for it.

3 years. Feels like forever. But what is that, really, in light of eternity? Soon enough, we will join you at our Savior’s feet.

Until then…

I will Look Up and Press On (Ps 121:1; Phil 3:14)